We’ve all been there. Whether it be a reunion…a local sporting event…or just a night out with friends or family. Inevitably someone ends up saying “those were the days”, referencing times of old where idealistic thoughts run rampant. That time was perfection we tell ourselves, an era where only happiness existed and difficulties have since vanished from our minds. So many yearn to relive those times as if they’ll never achieve that degree of happiness again. What if this is an ongoing trap however? One that continually reinvents itself as memories are replaced with new ones and we’re constantly thinking back to yesteryears. My proposal is that we live a different kind of life through a change in our mentality, a life that never peaks.

“That’s impossible Steve!!” Growing old will always come with a desire to relive the past. For everyone these timeframes may be different. Some will reminisce of high school or college years. Others will think back to when their children were younger and the memories that were made. Don’t get me wrong…the purpose of this message is not to say stop playing back your memories. What I’m getting at is to do so in a way that brings contentment in the present as well. Even as our bodies debilitate and we can no longer spring from the ground with tremendous vitality, we will still be living a life that hasn’t peaked.

This idea is to live every day life with purpose not just for the present, but for the future as well. For some time now whenever I’ve been tasked with making a more impactful decision in my life, I attempt to envision how I would reflect on this decision far later in life. Mistakes will of course still be made and resets will be needed (we’re all humans after all), but are we living in a manner that both our present and future self will appreciate? This is the first battle in ensuring a mentality not based in envy, but rather one of joy and continuous contentment.

Once you’ve begun making decisions in this capacity, it will become far easier to reminisce in a way that fosters joy. Think of it as a creation of your own personal documentary. One where you are developing new scenes for the movie that you will never grow tired of as you age. You’ll be able to watch this film year after year and become increasingly satisfied because of the decisions you’ve made and the memories you’ve created. Eventually you’ll have developed a Scorsese masterpiece. This masterpiece will be vibrant and filled with prideful moments. Moments that will be viewed with admiration by your older & wiser self.

Eventually a time will come where you’ll be faced with the inevitability of death. If you’re thinking this is where this post turns negative and there’s no way a positive spin can come from the prior statement you’ll be disappointed. You see there is a quote from the movie Troy (debated to have come from Homer’s Iliad), where Achilles, portrayed by Brad Pitt, states the following…”The gods envy us. They envy us because we’re mortal, because any moment may be our last. Everything is more beautiful because we’re doomed. You will never be lovelier than you are now. We will never be here again.”.

This quote has always stuck with me. Irrespective of religion or spirituality, this statement is impactful and applies greatly to the message I’m relaying. It is to say that even in our greatest moment of despair, the hope is that we can recognize the beauty of what we have created in this thing we call life. Our focus should not be on what we should have done differently, but rather on how proud we are of ourselves for living a life of purpose not just for the present, but for the future as well. It is a life that can be relived over and over again in our minds and bring about a level of peace, it is a life that never peaks.